Issue 94, Volume 83 2002-2003
Art Studio Grad Student Dies
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
UCSB graduate student Chris August passed away Sunday at 12:23 a.m. in the Santa Barbara area. He was in his early forties. The Santa Barbara County Coroner's Office could not be contacted for information regarding the cause of death.
State Triumphs in Coastal Oil Dispute
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
Any oil companies looking to develop leases off the coast of California will have to get by the state government first, as the federal government has backed off from its attempt to control all offshore drilling.
Elderly Man Kills Wife, Calls 911
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
Sheriff's deputies arrested an elderly Lompoc man Tuesday morning on suspicion of murdering his wife. Officers responded to the home of Eugene Carl Morgan, 77, after dispatch received information from a male caller who said he had just killed his wife.
Mediator Urges New Contract for C.U.E., UC
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
Almost two years of contract negotiations between the University of California and its clerical workers may finally come to an end in the coming weeks.
Do You Want Fries With That?
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
Battling for Their Lives
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
So far, the most alarming development is that of Saddam's paramilitary forces. More and more, it seems that these individuals - not tanks or contingents of uniformed soldiers - will determine the course of battle.
The Wednesday Hump
Pardon Me, but What Wind Through Yonder Orifice Breaks?
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
It is the female equivalent to limp dick. People refuse to discuss it. But being the disgustingly frank love kitten I am, I wanted the truth to be told. Can't hold my cunt trumpet down.
Women's Water Polo: Gauchos Sail Over Anteaters
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
The #11 UCSB women's water polo team continued its strong play of late, defeating #15 Irvine 6-5 at Campus Pool on Sunday. Senior two-meter offense Erin Lezak scored the game-winning goal with 18 seconds left, finishing off a strong comeback for the Gauchos. The goal was Lezak's 33rd of the season.
ILL Spittin' Game: Let's Play, Too
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
Men's Tennis: UCSB Fights for National Respect
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
The Gauchos, fresh off a dominating 6-1 victory over #65 Texas Tech on March 28, will face University of the Pacific on Saturday and then travel slightly south to battle Fresno State on Sunday.
Thump, Thump
Wednesday, April 2, 2003
There is a weatherpet this year. It happens to be a hamster. The weathercavemates enjoy tormenting the weatherpet. They like to turn its cage around and watch it get confused.